What to do with Fear

I’d like to move in the direction of longer posts as my awareness develops.  This entire website (and my entire life) is an evolving thing.

I’ve always had trouble keeping my writing concise.  I tend to follow one concept to the next and let my words flow like a river, on and on… which is fine, unless you’re trying to communicate basic truths to others.  So here goes.

I decided to cut myself off at a thousand words, which I hope any readers will appreciate.

What to do with Fear

When we come fully into our light, life flows naturally and freely. Gifts tend to appear mysteriously—except that it’s not so mysterious when we understand that pure consciousness (Christ consciousness, Holy Spirit, Buddha nature etc.) resides in everyone and everything.

This does not mean that all those who know their light won’t still experience pain, sorrow, and discomfort. The universe tends to support those who are growing in consciousness, but on a physical level, the universe does not “care” in the way humans do.

When consciousness begins to rise, a flood of feelings is often released. These are feelings from childhood trauma all the way up to the sting of whatever rude thing we accidentally said yesterday—or whatever careless comment was made to us. Every thoughtless action hurts.

Because humans have been dominated by insanity and darkness for so long, most of us carry a tremendous amount of pain. Even if you don’t “feel” like you have a lot of pain, it usually doesn’t take more than a few pointed questions to get someone face-to-face with the emotions they avoid on a regular basis. This often shows up as anger, defensiveness, and a nauseous feeling of powerlessness.

Moving through pain is not a pretty process. There will be tears, resistance, denial, and heinous attempts by the ego to hold onto pain, especially if our pain is part of who we think we are. The process is worthwhile, no doubt, like the pristine view from the top of a mountain. If we consider ourselves to be growth-oriented, we must accept that this is going to be the climb of our lives.

I’ll discuss the process of releasing/moving through old pain at a later point, but for now I want to say that some unpleasant emotions really do disappear at the “end” of the journey (In reality, there is no beginning or end, but let’s not to get too esoteric.):  Shame and regret dissolve as we see how unconscious we were when we acted in ways that were shameful/regrettable. Sadness becomes lighter and more “on the surface” while the oceans of peace within deepen and clarify. Sometimes, interestingly, we start to feel more joyous and playful when everyone around us is stone-faced.  It becomes clear that many people take the illusory nature of the world far too seriously, thereby cutting themselves off from the intoxicating bliss we’re hardwired to experience regularly.

Even though this is a beautiful place to be, fear can still creep up at times.

I define fear like this: Fear is as close as we get to the emotional opposite of love, although really, true love has no opposite. In the rare instances where fear is experienced, we honor our fear and remove ourselves from the situation that has created it, if necessary.  We trust that the emotion exists for a valid reason.

It is only those who are still confused about the nature of reality (i.e. are insane) who doubt the significance of their own feelings in favor of reason. When this happens, we turn away from our feelings, pushing away all that is uncomfortable and clinging to all that is pleasurable. Before we know it, we’re full-blown addicts (to thought, television, possessions, drugs, or all of the above), lacking the courage to do what’s right in this life.  Similarly, we may end up martyring ourselves for “causes” and staying stuck in victimhood.

Fear is nothing more than basic information. We can use other qualities—intuition, reasoning, instinct—to discern the real meaning of the fear.  If these three faculties are sharp, we become, in a way, bulletproof.  (Again, this does not necessarily protect us from random acts of insanity or freak accidents.  However, when we read intentions and appropriately honor fear, we are simply less likely to end up in dangerous situations.)

As a general rule, fear that is based around non-physical threats (anxiety, worrying) should be leaned into. Note how many fears are based around what “others” will think of you, and then note that almost everyone is so self-absorbed that they are entirely indifferent and/or unconscious of everything you’ve ever said or done. You can reach a point where it is tremendously freeing to realize that almost no one outside of your immediate family/friendship circle gives a damn about you.

After meeting social fears, we find ourselves in an interesting place: Still alive.  The experience we imagined would be the death of us was, in fact, just another experience.  And most of the time, we come out having had a better time because we pushed through fear. This is how we make new friends, build confidence, and move even deeper into natural soul/body alignment.

At a certain point, you may not want to put yourself out there anymore, but it won’t be because you’re afraid.  It’ll just be because you know your energy is better spent elsewhere.

Another general rule: Fear that is based around physical threats (someone nearby is acting violently or you’re climbing a rock face at the edge of your personal limits) should be honored.

“Honoring” fear does not mean we always yield to it, just as honoring a leader does not mean we accept everything they say. It only means that we pay attention, become alert, and notice how the rest of our bodies feel. We use every available tool to figure out the root of the fear, and then we act.

You can witness violence without incurring harm and you can climb the rock face even if you’re shaky with adrenaline. There is a line that no one can draw but you. Usually, this is where good instincts come in, and in such situations, you flee or fight back with no thought at all. Whatever happens at that point is out of your conscious control.

If you’re still “not sure” about what to do with your fear, just ask if what you’re afraid of could literally kill you or not. I’ve come to embrace this: If you’re afraid but know it won’t kill you, do it.